We all know that words have the power to create, destroy, bring about change. I’ve written a post about that in the past: http://www.
Our parents give us a name when we are born. This name becomes part of us as we grow up. It is the every day mantra that can bring about happiness, fear (when you did something bad and your mother calls you by your whole name haha), pride (when you are called at your graduation). It is a natural identification process for us. But not everyone feels their given name resonates with them. Some people decide to change it to something else that they feel more identified with. And that is ok.
In the Pagan community people use what we call a “spiritual name”. It’s usually a name that we choose based on a number of different starting points, be it personal preference, numerology, astrology or divination for example.
When I started my journey into the Pagan spiritual path, I chose a spiritual name based on the pantheon that I followed, which is Egyptian. The name was very dear to me and many people came to know me by that name; mostly other Pagans but some non Pagan friends as well.
When I came to a crossroads in my life in which huge life-altering changes were unfolding, I felt the need to change my name. Not only was I entering a new spiritual phase in my life, but I was walking away from a destructive period as well, and unfortunately, my name became stained with that negativity (I will not mention that name because it is in the past and no longer serves me, although it will always be in my heart).
That is when I became Oscura. In Spanish this word means dark. For years, I embraced my dark side. I became empowered by it. I grew with it, I learned from it, and enjoyed many new blessings coming into my life. Oscura was a diamond in the raw, needing to be put under a lot of pressure and hardship to finally come out of that shell. I found out that by embracing my dark side I was realizing the balance that was needed in life. Being in the light all the time leaves you imbalanced, very imbalanced. It is a denial of your own truth. There is much beauty and comfort in our dark sides; there is a warmth and resting place that is waiting for us to nurture it. And when we do nurture it, a balance is reached. I felt like a beacon of light was activated.
As I kept moving forward, the path opened up even more for me, and the blessings kept pouring in. I felt a stir within. An old layer is peeling away, and that layer is called Oscura. I can no longer identify with this name…but what am I to do? I meditated on Divine guidance. I read, I researched, I studied my dreams. What is the next step? How do I know what my name is now? It isn’t Oscura any longer.
For months nothing came to me, it was not time yet. I stopped chasing. I would let it come to me instead. And the first sign came. A Vedic astrologer tells me that a name change is coming, a spiritual name. Months later, I learn about spiritual names that Kundalini Yoga teachers take. I had been taking Kundalini Yoga classes but didn’t know about this until it was the right time I guess.
And then I decided to become a Kundalini Yoga teacher myself after much research and meditation on it. And so, the time felt right and I requested my spiritual name.
When my spiritual name was delivered to me, I was very nervous and couldn’t read it at first. It was a nervous excitement. When I finally sat down after a few days and read it, tears streamed down my face. This is me! And so, Nam Kirin Kaur steps into the light….
Nam Kirin Kaur is the sacred Princess/Lioness who manifests the Light of the Divine in the world by meditating on the Name of God.
I step from the darkness into the light. Oscura has blossomed into Nam Kirin Kaur. Nam means the Name of God/Goddess and Kirin means ray of light. I feel that this is so right and so perfectly timed. I am ever so grateful!